A good friend just told me she has stopped reading my blog because she doesn't recognize me in the posts I write. She used for example a post about things that bother me, and said "nothing bothers you!" I have been curious and perplexed ever since. It's someone who has known me for a long long time, a person who I tell most everything to, and with whom I've been through a lot of experiences and life changes, but maybe not in precisely the same way that I express them in these posts.
I think it's wonderful that every person has many dimensions. It's more complicated than acting differently in different settings or keeping parts of ourselves for some people and not for others. We show up differently in different lights, and according to what the other person is wanting, needing and thinking. I know for sure that when someone expresses a feeling very strongly, it is more a reflection of him or herself than it is about the person to whom he or she is speaking. Like advice, it's never for the person who is receiving it. It's really the person giving it, talking to himself.
I am delighted when I find out things about other people that are surprises. I hope I can figure out a way to express that to my friend so maybe she will take delight in the things she finds strange or just new about me. I'm still changing. We all are. Maybe right now I am restless and she is contented. Hmmm, but saying that I have to know I'm really talking about myself (according to my theory, anyway). Hmmmm
question - if it isn't me, talking about you, then could it be me talking about me by talking about you?
mompoet - Escher-psyche