Tuesday, November 28, 2006
A few minutes later I breathed a semi-voluntary "yes!" to something the trainer said. The woman beside me looked over and whispered, "I know you! The last time I saw you, you were dressed up as a chicken!"
This left me wondering who she is, and where we met. I admit, I have dressed up like a chicken more than once, at work yet.
question: what do you do when someone remembers you, but you don't remember her?
mompoet - cluck cluck, I don't remember your name! cluck, cluck
I told him he needed to wear something snow-proof on his feet for the 1km walk to school. "You'll be so uncomfortable, and you might even get frostbite." I warned. After a bit of arguing he walked to school wearing hiking boots, with his trusty running shoes in his backpack.
So our daughter (who listened to the whole discussion) has already left for school before our son goes out the door. With everyone gone, I tidy up the scatter of boots in the entryway. Hmmm, there are our daughter's boots. Wonder what she wore to school? Running shoes?
So today everyone can wear whatever they please. They might be uncomfortable but I think that frostbite is a bit of an exaggeration.
question: so, do you think I'm being too much of a mom?
mompoet - I have 2 pairs of boots. If I could, I would wear them both simultaneously.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Oh no - cars are slipping and sliding and the man on the radio says "If you don't have to go anywhere, don't." That's good enough for me.
We made it through the snow last night to a banjo-popping earthy hot and wonderful concert at the Cultch. My roots wuz jumpin' up and down all night. When we got outside we discovered about 3 inches of new snow. There was snow on the road all of the way home, but hardly any cars so we drove slowly slowly home from Vancouver to Port Moody. We got up the hill to home and I crawled into bed at midnight. My little Honda with 4 snow tires and two brave women did just fine. And talking to Myrna I kept calm. I told her if I had been by myself I would have been singing my head off just to keep steady.
Now this morning there's more and more and more snow. The dog went out for 2 minutes to pee, and came back in with a white blanket on her back.
The radio will tell me if the kids are expected to go to school. I'll work from my dining room table. Tomorrow is another day. In the meantime I don't need to go anywhere, so I won't.
question: where do you go in the snow?
mompoet - going now to phone Andy who had to start work at 4am - I hope his drive in was safe and slither-free
Sunday, November 26, 2006
It always snows before my birthday, and yesterday it snowed. Andy and I had plans for my birthday supper out, but I got worried that we might get snowed in so I stopped in at the grocery store and bought everything for a special family supper in case we got stuck. But by suppertime it was just snowing and not sticking so we went out and had a great supper and watched the snow falling (but not sticking) through the restaurant window. When we got home it was so cozy and wintry we went to bed early. Andy woke up at 4 (his usual go-to-work time) but I slept in until 9. What luxury to sleep for over 10 hours! It snowed and rained on and off through the night, and it's snowing this morning, and sticking, but not accumulating too seriously, which is good. This afternoon, one of us needs to drive Fi to a rehearsal on the North Shore (where it really snows) and one of us has to take Alex for a job interview. Then tonight I'm going to a concert, but I'm getting ahead of myself.
Supper at Michele's house on Friday was lovely and relaxed. Michele and her husband Brent are renovating a 1912 house in New Westminster. It's a tremendous amount of work for them, and it's turning out spectacularly. Michele always lives in the coolest places. Given my choice of where to sit and enjoy a meal and a glass of wine, Michele's house is always #1. I know I said I don't need presents, but Michele and Kathy got me some. Kathy gave me a very homely Christmas angel ornament that she said only I could love, and a bag of jelly belly jelly beans and Sarah McLachlin's new Christmas CD, Wintersong. I really like the CD. It's all very mellow and has a beautiful and unusual alto-line version of "What Child is This." Michele gave me a bottle of wine and tickets to "Diggin' our Roots" with Po Girl at the Vancouver East Cultural Centre - tonight. So I'm hoping the snow will not be too bad, because Michele and Myrna and I are going. Michele also baked me a chocolate birthday cake that she poked and filled up with butterscotch schnapps (mmm). I gave Kathy and Michele candy apple red nailpolish so they can have red toenails for Christmas.
On Friday afternoon I packed a day's worth of work into my briefcase and emailed some documents home, so if it snows a lot tonight I can work from home on Monday. I guess I'm sounding like a real wimp in the snow. The truth is, we live on a hill that doesn't get plowed until the very last of all the roads, and while I'm fine out on the main roads I live in fear of sliding out onto the highway from our steep and unplowed sidestreet and/or not being able to get back up the hill to our house at the end of the day. I do have 4 snow tires on the car and I do want to get to the concert tonight, and Myrna will drive with me and is a strong and inspiring presence, so I have a hunch we'll make it tonight. Just the same, I'll pack boots, gloves and a ski jacket in the trunk in case we have to walk a ways.
In the meantime I am lounging in my pajamas, drinking coffee, and beginning to read The Red Tent. I finished The Time Traveller's Wife. It was spectacular, and a first novel for Audrey Niffeneger, so I can't wait to see what she does next. For a while anyway, let it snow.
question: with what delights has this weekend greeted you?
mompoet - twinkling
Friday, November 24, 2006
Today I will begin my birthday. Kathy and Michele (the ones who took me pole dancing last year) have invited me to supper at Michele's house. I'm pretty sure there's no pole dancing on the menu this year, but Michele also wants me for something for Sunday night. This is the same Michele who kidnapped me after work one year on my birthday and took me for candle-lit November picnic with a campfire at a local park, so anything could happen.
I'll go out Saturday evening for a nice supper with Andy, and my Mom's cooking supper on Wednesday (my actual birthday) to celebrate with Mom, Dad, Andy and the kids, then the ladeez in the 'hood have asked me to come for supper next Friday. At our office we have a tradition you have to bring your own cake on your birthday, but I'll take the day off to go on Alex's field trip, so I'll have a bit of an office birthday on Tuesday or Thursday, depending when I feel like baking. Finally, my birthday-almost-twin Louise and I will go for lunch on December 8. We've shared a lunch at the same restaurant for almost 20 years on "our" birthday. So all in all that makes for a 2-week long stretch birthday. Then there's Christmas.
I don't need presents, but I do love the celebrations. Treats and love and fun. Yeah.
question: how do you observe your birthday?
mompoet - Happy birthday to me, and to Louise and to Mary Anne - both celebrating today, November 24
Thursday, November 23, 2006
In other news, I decided to keep the swan salt cellars. They were a wedding present after all. The exercise bike is going over to my mom and dad's place. The giraffe is still lurking - probably a Christmas vacation project. Maybe we'll mail him to the Serengetti where he can be re-introduced to the wild.
question: what will I do now when I want to embarass my children?
mompoet - hokey enough to embarrass with gusto, even without the bad coat
yourself first then everyone around you and especially the special ones
the only thing you have to lose is the opportunity
question: how is it I forget how lucky I am with such frequency?
mompoet - surrounded by love every day
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
1 medium onion, diced
1 or 2 garlic cloves, chopped
1 boneless, skinless chicken breast
3 cups chicken stock
3 potatoes, peeled and cubed
4 small cans creamed corn
1 1/2 cups frozen corn kernels
2 cups homo milk
salt and pepper
Saute the chicken breast until it's cooked. Chop or shred it and set aside. Saute the onion and the garlic. Add the chicken broth and potatoes and bring to a boil. Simmer until the potatoes are cooked. Mash the potatoes partially. Stir in the creamed corn and frozen corn and chicken meat. Heat to a boil. Remove from heat, add the milk and season to taste. Do not boil again once the milk has been added.
Top with grated cheese if you like.
Add hot sauce if you want it zippy.
Variation - Use some crumbled crispy bacon instead of chicken breast or for a veggie version skip the meat altogether and use vegetable broth. The cheese should provide enough protein.
Fast, easy and filling.
question: what soup do you like best?
mompoet - thanks for the chickpea curry Cathy - I ate it for breakfast!
What video? Canadian Bacon, starring John Candy. Might as well stick with the theme, eh?
question: have you mailed any Christmas parcels?
mompoet - going to buy a big chocolate bar before I seal the thing up. Must always include chocolate in all parcels to Africa.
- Mom returned from India. I let Dad have her all to himself for the day but we talked on the phone.
- Irene phoned. I always like it when she does.
- The drier repairman came and fixed the clothes drier which has been broken since Thursday. phew.
- I got all of the backed-up orthodontics claim forms filled out and ready to go in the mail (that means we will get some money back).
- I cleared off two computer desks and the table in the hallway that were filled with miscellaneous junk.
- I organized the volunteer list and schedule for the Christmas recital (4 shows and a dress rehearsal, about 25 parents per show so it's a big list!)
- I read my novel for about 2.5 hours total. It's The Time Traveller's Wife. I'm loving it.
- Kirsi came over for tea. I always love when she does.
- The ladeez are planning birthday supper for me. They are peaches and jewels and treasures in my life.
- I waited for Alex after school. He took us on an errand and for a practice drive. He is getting to be quite a confident and skilled driver.
- I finally remembered to book a couple of appointments that I usually only remember in the middle of the night.
- I made corn chowder and grilled cheese sandwiches for supper.
- Dog and I went for a long walk and it wasn't raining.
- I had my first chai tea of the cold and damp season. mmmm
- I went to bed at 10.
Question: what do you do when you have a "discretionary day?"
mompoet - not jealous of anyone's couch just now
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Welcome home Mom!
Welcome home Mom!
Welcome home Mom!
question: why is home really home when your mom comes home?
mompoet - daughter of mompoet's mom
Friday, November 17, 2006
Almost constant rain, sudden and early darkness, skies heavy and low by day. There's an excitement in the contrast between interior and exterior, warm and cool, wet and dry, dark and light that excites my senses more than any glorious sunrise or day that goes on and on. Bright colours look best on a dark background. All that is bright and good and safe and warm can be seen so clearly these days.
I know it's a time of increased hardship for homeless people and those who suffer from seasonal depression, but I love this time of year for myself. Wet or dry, cold or mild, there's not a chance of Indian Summer, no turning back. Only one direction - onward to the longest night.
question: what is your favourite time of year?
mompoet - only 12 days until my birthday
Thursday, November 16, 2006
- my phone did not ring at work today (well, it did once or twice, but not incessantly with multiple voicemails showing after every call)
- my good friend Cathy read this morning's post and brought me a gift of chickpea curry and the secret to perfect bluejeans for us peasant-legged types
- the book I had a hold on was ready for me at the library and I remembered to pick it up
- organic spring greens with wine vinegar, olive oil and some nice feta
- my warm winter coat
- my son's even warmer coat for the dog walk this morning (mom's perogative to hijack son's coat whenever she pleases)
- on the subject of coats, we found the coat for Fi's Christmas recital at the very first V.V. Boutique that we visited, then we had fun finding lots of really awful coats and threatening to wear them in public.
- some pretty bad shoes too, and a device called "Sit and Spin" (I do not exaggerate)
- a Great Dane leaned on me and smiled
- Ugly Betty is on TV tonight
- somebody told me I look beautiful
- remembering The Sound of Music hilarious crew show 30 years ago when Fiona asked about when I was in musical theatre
- the dog stole a box of chocolate almonds from my briefcase in the middle of the night and ate them all and she didn't barf or poo all over the house while we were at work and school today (phew and thank goodness for poor quality chocolate that is harmless to dogs)
- kudos from 2 bosses on the email first thing this morning for our team project at work (a presentation at the Parks Commission meeting last night)
- no more nights out this week
- Andy cooked supper so I could sit and post blog when I got home and wait for supper to be ready
question: what made you feel good today?
mompoet - well, now a bath with candles would be just a perfect ending, wouldn't it?
Normally I feed on the energy of the people around me, and feel good about feeling good with people and them feeling good with me. I'm feeling that other inclination these days, which is a sign of needing a rest. The other sign is when my normally absolutely unbelievably good luck turns around.
On Tuesday I had a minor car crash. A lady was distracted by her kids in the back seat, and slid into the back of my car on a wet road. We're all okay, and the cars weren't even damaged because I saw her coming and moved forward as much as I could before she hit. But to me, that's another sign that I'm overextending myself to the edge of where the going is good. It's like God or the cosmos saying, "take a different path."
Also, I notice myself being jealous of really mundane things. Like driving in the car I see a house, with the lights on in the living room and some people sitting on the couch and I say to myself, "I wish I could just be sitting on the couch." I remember this impulse at its silliest, back when I was a student teacher, having an absolutely terrible practicum, doubting my ability to function effectively, I drove past the old Oakalla Prison every morning where the guards were on strike and picketing. I said to myself, "I wish I was a prison guard on strike and not a student teacher." Now how silly is that?
So now I have to back up and listen to the little voice that is probably just telling me to spend fewer nights out and more time at home. I also have to take a look at work and do some re-framing so I'm not feeling like I'm hitting the ground running every morning, and squishing my office door shut on yelping undone tasks at the end of every day.
I have the power to feel better. Enjoying zesty days is my forte. I just have a bit of work to do right now. I'll start with some nesting. Family, book, couch, bed, answering machine - all good.
question: do you ever notice yourself sliding?
mompoet - time for self-care
Our amazing The Svelte Ms Spelt organized a Slam Decathlon as a fundraiser for the Individual World Poetry Slam that we'll host in Vancouver in February. More than a dozen poets formed two teams and competed playfully in events like cupcake haiku, scrabble, and box of doom cover slam. As you can see, there was also a puppet show, mime and a cowbell. It was a night of stepping out of the box for a good cause. Good fun-raising and fund-raising.
Hooray for the Vancouver Poetry Slam and especially for Ms Spelt, who is also Artistic Director of iWPS 2007 in Vancouver.
Question: would you rather cupcake haiku or more cowbell?
mompoet - puppet-maker to the poets
Monday, November 13, 2006
upstairs, the son and the husband slumber
in the basement 4 girls and a dog
the dog is especially happy
(denning is a rare treat)
this morning I opened the front door quietly to get the newspaper
even the coffee-maker whispered
and the cat stopped yelling because I fed her very quickly
I turned off the speakers so no one would hear the Windows fanfare
checked quiet email
drank water not too cold
so no shock waves would stir the sleepers
cinnamon buns are shouting molecules of of joy up and down the stairs
tantalizing sleepy brains to rise
rise like bread dough
pop out like popovers
rub crusty eyes and stumble
up stairs or down
to the centre of the house
where I'm mixing gooey white frosting
yes! they're almost ready
let's have some now
we'll go skating today
question: when do you find quiet?
mompoet - I love long weekends
Sunday, November 12, 2006
It was a great year, grade 3, in many ways. That was such a fun place to live with the woods and the snow and the ditch and the tire swing. The commute over the bridge to get to the university to work drove my dad nuts though, so we moved into Burnaby after just a year, which turned out to be a pretty good move after all. The Burnaby house is still there, just the same as I remember. And Burnaby house #2 they bought, so they are still there today.
It's funny how a place can stick in your mind like that. It feels good to go have a look and be sure that it looks the way I remember it. Things change, but enough stays the same that I know my memory-thread is real and true. I wonder what our kids will remember and where they'll go back to look? They haven't moved around like I did, but they have attended different schools and made friends in a variety of places. I bet they'll want to go back and look one day too.
question: have you returned to a place to find it changed but the same?
mompoet - long roots
Starbucks move (?!?) about a girl from an inner-city school who makes it to the National Spelling bee. Laurence Fishburne. True-life braniac children under pressure. Big heart. Starbucks ending (I'll have a latte AND a mocha. So there.)
Rating: 1 sniffle, 2 awwwws, 1 snort
Borat (big screen)
16 year old boy raved all the way home. The more scenes recounted, the less inclined mom is to want to see it except for that impulse to look at something run-over by the side of the road kind of curiosity. Maybe the part about trying to stuff Pamela Anderson in a sack so he can take her back to Kazakhstan and marry her?
Rating: 16 years THE BEST I HAVE EVER SEEN!
44.999 year WELL, MAYBE
Stranger than Fiction (big screen)
This one sneaked up on us (Fiona and me). Will Ferrell less Ferrell-ish than usual (very good). Emma Thompson (good). Dustin Hoffman (portraying a cross between God and Mr. McGoo). Maggie Gyllenhall (good). Queen Latifah (I want to look like queen latifah). Much more subtle than Being John Malkovich or Adaptation or all of the other reality-warp movies with which it is being compared. I want to go back and look again for all of the little-rary references.
Rating: 13 years - thumbs up
writer/reader/Will-Ferrel-fan-not mom - thumbs up
Tsotsie (dvd) - tonight in a living room near us
question: do you love the movies?
mompoet - I love the movies
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Part 1: the Real Live Dead People
It took 90 minutes to walk through the exhibit, and I would have taken longer but we had to go up to the Omnimax for the Human Body movie. The exhibit is nicely set up so you can move from one thing to another and return to re-check a part if a subsequent display makes you want another look back ("so that's where the pancreas is - let me go back and look at the pancreas in the display case"). There are bones and organs and nerves and blood vessels in small parts and whole human beings. The whole people and parts are arranged/posed for dramatic effect and to illustrate how the parts work and fit together in the body. There are healthy and diseased parts (including a cross section of a 300 pound man, body fat intact), even artificial parts. One female body has an artifical knee, elbow and ankle. The exhibit is arranged from the easiest to view (bones and muscles) to the most difficult (embryos and fetuses).
I was surprised by a few things - mostly size and proportion:
- The lungs are much smaller that I thought they would be, and the thoracic cavity takes up much less of the torso than the abdominal cavity does. This makes sense, even when I look at myself in the mirror, but I always picture lungs as really big when they fill up with air. Flatten your hand. The outline of your lung is about that size if not a little smaller.
- The aorta and vena cava are gigantic! I pictured the big blood vessels like outdoor power cords, but they are closer to garden hoses, not quite, but almost. You could put your thumb inside your aorta.
- Human muscles look like meat. Okay. They are meat. Still, it's really something when you see it.
- The bones of the inner ear (hammer, anvil and stirrup) could all fit on your baby finger nail with room to spare. They are impossibly tiny.
- Kneecaps are not much bigger than pop bottle caps.
- The bones of the feet are as delicate as those of the hands.
- Blood vessels are everywhere.
- The small intestine is quite alarming when it is unravelled.
- Fetuses make me cry.
Part 2: Watching the Watchers
The teachers were aware that the trip was controversial. They offered to excuse any students who chose not to attend (it would not affect their marks) and welcomed all parents who wished to attend. Not many parents attended. All but one student in Fi's class chose to attend.
While we were in the gallery, there were grade 10 students, grade 8s and a bunch of elementary school kids (probably grade 4 and 5). There were also adults who weren't part of a school group. I followed 3 nurses for a while. Every piece or person prompted patient stories. It was fun to overhear some of them. I chatted with quite a few people at the displays. Lots of people were talking to other people about what they were seeing and what it meant. The displays of disease (arthritis, leukemia, hemmoragic stroke, polycystic kidney disease) prompted discussion of illnesses of friends and family members. The teenagers were respectful and thoughful, if quick to bypass some displays. I saw two girls about 15, say to two similar-aged boys, "Look, a tumor of the testes." But they weren't giggling or grossing out. They were interested. Nobody seemed to be concerned by the penises and vaginas and anuses on display. I guess when you are looking at someone's liver you don't mind looking at sex organs too. It felt like we all knew we were looking at real people. We knew it was a special experience. Mostly what I felt myself and around me were curiosity, amazement and awe.
Contrast that with the Omnimax experience. The Science World Lady is reciting the rules (turn off your cell phones, don't take pictures, bla bla bla, no laser pointers) as laser pointer dots dance around her head on the screen behind her. Even so, the movie was good enough that the kids settled down and paid attention. They were delightfully grossed out by the churning stomach contents, especially when the bile squirted in, and by the zit-pop scene.
I'm glad I went on this trip with the school. I look forward to a second viewing with Alex's school later this month. I bet grade 10s and 11s will be fun to watch too, along with the real, live, dead people.
question: do you think you would like to see this exhibit? or if you did already, what do you think?
mompoet - real live live person
question: have you seen it?
mompoet- delighting in curiosity
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
question: is it anthropomorphizing when applied to a planet?
mompoet - planets are my friends
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Monday, November 06, 2006
Sunday, November 05, 2006
On her way home from errands, mom notices that all of the other houses in the neighbourhood had no Halloween decorations left. She reckons it is time to get ours down too. But when she arrives at home, nobody shares her conviction. Vague responses are given to her inquiries about the timing of decoration-removal. Not satisfied with lukewarm assurances that the pumpkins and cobwebs will be gone before the Christmas lights are put up, mom goes outside to do it herself.
As mom dresses in old jeans and a launder-able waterproof jacket and gumboots, a smallish wart pops up on her chin. She goes down to the basement to find a pair of pliers but cannot find them in the tangle of discarded tools. A biggish wart pops out on her forehead and one on her nose also. Her fingernails lengthen and take on a greenish cast.
Outside, mom commences pulling one-point-five quadrillion staple-gun staples out of the carport in order to remove a huge variety of halloween lights and decorations. With each twist of a staple, she grunts a witchy grunt. With each grunt, a tuft of her usually shining and bouncy hair turns iron-black and straw-like. When she pinches her finger with the pliers the wart on her chin sprouts 3 long whitish wirey hairs. Her greenish grayish eyes turn slitty and yellow.
Now mom climbs up on a plastic patio chair chair to remove the staples too high for her reach. Rain gushes from the clogged eavestroughs onto her head. She clutches a handful of staples in her gnarled fist and feels her teeth transforming into long yellowing fangs.
Lights and decorations removed, mom turns her attention to the styrofoam tombstones and fake cobwebs. Scooping armfuls of soggy cobwebs out of the branches of the lavender and boxwood plants, mom notices a large hump developing on her right shoulder. As she moves toward the garbage shed with a dripping tangle of cobwebs and attached branches and leaves, she notices that her usually confident and springy walk has transformed into a freakish shuffle. One foot is noticibly larger than the other, the the toes of her running shoes are now pointy and curled up at the tips.
Finally, the pumpkins. Mom muses on a radio spot she heard earlier this week, touting pumpkin-scented oil as the ultimate aphrodisiac. "Not from these pumpkins," she thinks as she carefully drains rainwater from the slimy interiors of the jack-o-lanters lining her carport. She carries 2 pumpkins to the trash with no mishap, but pumpkin number 4 turns out to be full of pumpkin slimewater even though it appeared to be empty. A reeking cascade soaks the front of her jeans and trickles inside one her of boots. Mom's lips shrivel and turn black. Her nose and chin grow longer and curl inwards toward one another.
Half an hour later, mom is inside, unwinding with a glass of wine. Dad and daughter come in. Nobody says thank you, but somebody notices that the rather large coffin was not brought into the house. Pale, sulphurous smoke curls from mom's ears. Her tongue turns green with orange spots.
Forty-five minutes later, mom is mom again. She finished the wine, posted her blog and reminded her family that she says "thanks" for jobs well done and appreciates their thanks and recognition. Now she is no longer a witch. The healthy supper that she cooks for them is not poisoned with magic toadstools. When she tucks them into bed later, they hardly even notice the warts.
question: what job do you detest?
mompoet - working on working out resentment because it gets yukkier and yukkier if you hang onto it
Work has been busier, more challenging and more stressful than I can remember since 1988 when I helped to open a mega-big rec centre. This is different thought. It's just everyday demands compounding and accelerating. I'm not sure yet if it's cyclical or a trend that will continue indefinitely. I certainly hope it's the former.
Luckily, I work with a team of energetic, even-tempered, ambitious and down-to-earth people, including a good and compassionate boss. My co-workers are able to laugh hysterically when the demands get ridiculously overwhelming, and not get too upset by some of the near misses and minor catastrophes that come with over-business. The other day in a team meeting (which included a yummy supper - shared food helps too) we just burst out laughing for a few minutes, then got back to work. We stay aware of each other's home lives and interests and thus reinforce the important idea that this is just work, that the important part of life happens before and after. And we go home, and we support each other so we can take days off for field trips, orthodontist appointments, vacations.
Which brings me to vacation. For the first time in my full-time working life (which began in 1984) I will take 3 weeks paid vacation time all at one time. That's 15 workdays plus the surrounding weekends, plus the first day back to school - a lovely luxury - to just unwind. Before this I have taken only 2 weeks at a time so I'd be sure to have enough to cover all of the important holidays and times with the family. This year I have more paid vacation, so I'm going for it. I'll have a whole week off while the kids are still in school, and I'll take that first day when they go back, just to get ready to return to the office.
I wonder what I'll do? I'm sure I will sleep in, work out, read books, see friends, hang out with my family, watch foreign movies (remember my New Year's Resolution?), and I think there's another 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle in the plan.
I'll also help out with our daughter's Christmas panto. She's in a production of Aladdin that will run right through Christmas. Besides driving her back and forth to the theatre I'll help backstage. I have even volunteered to be "half of a camel" for at least some of the performances. I know, "WHICH HALF?" Here's my stock answer to a question that I have now hear at least a dozen times:
"WHICHEVER HALF IS EMPTY."
Here's the show. If you make it, be sure to applaud both halves of the camel. One of them might be me.
For now, I will enjoy the last 30 workdays and try to stay healthy. So far not one sick day this year and we need the whole sick pay rebate (in excess of $1 kilobuck) for a math tutuor for semester 2 Math Principles 11. Tra la la!
question: will you take winter vacation this year?
mompoet - counting up/down with anticipations
Saturday, November 04, 2006
Thursday, November 02, 2006
I was riding home on the bus and
what usually happens
everyone could hear my thoughts
I think about this almost every time I ride the bus
the people are sitting there
and listening to everything I think and feel
I think, “I gotta pee”
they think, “she has to pee”
I think “That guy with the ipod and the track suit looks like my brother
they think “that guy with the ipod and the track suit looks like her brother”
I think, “If I thought about murdering someone or robbing a bank or having sex with someone on this bus, would everyone hear that?”
They think, “yes, we would hear that.”
It only happens on the bus, most of the time
But never on the 97 bus because 97 is a prime number
It’s the B-line, and if B was a letter, it would be a prime number
Because B is two
B is the only even prime number letter
C is a prime number also
but it’s not even
even so, the C24 bus is safe too because if you add up the number 24 and the letter C
you get 27
which isn’t a prime number
but it’s the cube of a prime so it’s even better
so on some buses the people can’t hear my thoughts
but on most they can
they act natural because they all agreed ahead of time that that’s the best way to deal with
listening to my thoughts
like they had a meeting or something about me
everyone in the world
everyone who rides the bus, anyway
they all agreed to just act natural
so I try to think thoughts like elevator music
so I won’t give away too many secrets
I sometimes imagine that someone I know is watching me when I’m all by myself
I imagine that the person is admiring me
thinking I’m pretty amazing or talented
or at least loveable
or at least funny
I imagine they’re sneaking around, disguised as someone else
or they hired someone with a hidden camera
or planted a spy camera in a room where I’ll be all by myself
and they’re watching on a monitor
in a van down the street
I’m usually pretty careful to act
or at least funny when I think they’re watching
but then I realize I just ate my entire salad with my fingers
dipping leaf clusters into balsamic vinegar
then I licked my fingers
then I farted
but I stood up first so I wouldn’t squeak the chair
I hate when that I fart-squeak the chair
it's so undignified
then I realize it’s probably just as well that nobody is watching
or at least if they are I hope they think I’m
enough to like to see me eating salad with my fingers and farting off the chair
sometimes I think babies are really
old, wise aliens
they are sent to earth to observe us
and send data back to their planets
they can understand everything we say
and hear our thoughts
and sometimes they even control our thoughts
to see if we’ll do what they telepath us to do
then they grow up and turn into ordinary kids
after they’ve done their work
and transmitted data
about how we act around little babies
up to their mother ship
one time I peed my pants at the
not just a little squirt
a whole gusher
I just couldn’t make it to the bathroom on time
I threw my underwear in the trash
mopped up as best I could with t.p.
wrapped my hoodie around my waist to hide the wet patch on my jeans
and went to look at tom thompson anyway
my mother says as you get older you lose a bit of your control
but I’ve always been this way
she says you also understand better that you never had
as much control as you thought you had
and I think she’s right about that
sometimes I talk to my mother when she’s not there
sometimes, when she’s there, I don’t
I just second guessed myself
I looked up prime numbers on the internet
97 is a prime for sure
the next one after it is 101
if we rode the 99 bus together it would be a prime because us and 99
add up to 101
we should ride the bus together one time
you know what I’m thinking
even when the bus
question: am I the only one?
mompoet - suspecting not
I worked on Halloween Day, but came home early in the afternoon to prepare. Everyone in our neighbourhood gets into Halloween in a big way, and we get lots of trick-or-treaters (almost 200 this year). We sit in the carport to hand out candies, and I serve coffee and brownies to the parents. It was really cold out, so the coffee was popular this year. Here are some pictures from the office and our neighbourhood.
question: did you have a good Halloween?
mompoet - spooky