Some pictures from my birthday

Birthday Weekend

Yesterday was my 46th birthday. My gift to myself was to have a weekend full of stuff that I want to do, so...

I worked just half a day on Thursday. This half day included a one hour break for a massage appointment. My employer arranges for massage therapy students to come in and do massages for their practice work. I had a one-hour lovely treatment for my tight trapezius and sub-occipital muscles (upper back, shoulders, neck). That was great! Then at the office we spent the lunch hour building festive hanging baskets for our skate lobby. We had a potluck lunch too. I brought a birthday cake that I baked for five of us who all have birthdays about this time. We all sang, and the five birthday girls blew out the candles.

After the lunch I went to the movies by myself. This is my idea of the happiest, most indulgent way to spend an afternoon when life is just too busy. I can check out for a couple of hours, go to another world, and be there by myself. In the darkness of the movie theatre the disconnection from all other distractions is almost complete. I love it.

I saw Lars and the Real Girl. It's about a man who is disconnected from the people around him, unable to respond to love or express his emotions. He gets a life-size plastic woman doll and interacts with her as his real life girlfriend. His family thinks he is having a mental crisis, so they consult his doctor, who advises them to go along with it and behave as if the doll is a real person. Pretty soon the family and the whole town has embraced "Bianca," as a real person. It sounds really weird but it is very good. It's not crude or silly. It's very tender, in fact. There are lots of funny parts, and sad ones too. Mostly it's about love: how we give it, how we accept it, and how we learn to do these things. If you haven't seen it, hurry and do. It will be out of theatres soon, and it won't be the same on DVD.

At home after the movie, I hung out with the family a bit, then we went over to my parents' house for supper. Mom made a beautiful Thai food supper, and Fiona brought her specialty chocolate layer cake. It was very nice. We were home before 8pm, and I crashed before 11. Oh yeah, we watched the DVD of Hairspray. Well, I watched about 80% of it, in between naplets that kept capturing me on the couch.

Today I'm off work again. Fi has a Pro D day from school so we'll do a bit of shopping. I went to the gym this morning and got a new workout from my friend Adriana, who is getting her personal trainer certifications, so I am one of her practice clients.

Lots more fun coming: Andy's work Christmas party at a fancy restaurant, Fi's Christmas recital, and of course, snow. We're ready for it. It may mess with our plans a bit, but that's okay. We'll work around it and enjoy it.

Thank you to everyone who has sent me emails, facebook greetings, cards and sweet surprises on my doorstep and on my desk at work. My birthday was wonderful, and I'm now basking in the continuing treatsy-ness of the weekend.

question: do you give gifts to yourself?

mompoet - life is delicious

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frost on the ground

dreambit

I am at the produce store. Earlier, I have emptied and organized the veggie bins in my fridge. I realise that I have brought with me an old hand of ginger that was in my fridge. It's a bit puckery, but still good for cooking. It's awkward to carry it at the produce store, because I'm afraid someone will think I'm shoplifting it. Then I see a sign on the wall, "This rack for produce you have brought from home." I put my wrinkly ginger in a plastic bag, stow it on the rack, and resume my shopping.

question: ginger?

mompoet - puckery

sweet potato

Dooce linked this livejournal post. It's good if you like dogs, or sweet potatoes, and maybe even if you aren't interested in either. Check it out.

question: what's that sound?

mompoet - co-habiting with omnivores of various species

chilly morning haiku

frost, soft on green moss
tempts bare-toed shock-bite firewalk
come gently, winter

if you are bored at work

spellcheck your co-workers names then substitute their spellchecked names for their real names in you Outlook contacts.

spellcheck if my favourite joke

blogger spellcheck corrects "poo" to "pew" "polo" "pogo" "poor" or "pool." My choice.

pooo

poo

Driving home from the photo booth last night I spotted some strange debris on the road. I remember thinking, "it can't be." Well, it was. When we got out of the car, Alex complained long and loud, then ran into the house. It smelled really awful. But it was dark and I thought, "it couldn't be." Well, it was.

In the morning, dressed for work and in a bit of a hurry, I went out to my car..."OH CRAP!" (literally). It was awful. In the light of day I saw it. My nearly new left front snowtire (you know, the one beside the driver's door) flush-deep in dog poo. Worse, the poo was kicked up all inside the wheel well. It seemed to be evenly distributed all around, in amazing quantity. That was a big dog, and I must have made a direct hit (of the poo, I mean. I did not hit any dogs in this story).

This was worse than stepping in it in Vibram-soled hiking boots. This was a full-on embedded poo experience.

I know what you're thinking, and yes, I do have a garden hose, but I was dressed for work (heels, nice jeans, velvet jacket, earrings) and had little time to spare. I just didn't want to risk splashback and the resulting delay. I drove the stinkmobile to work, parked at the far back corner of the lot, and resolved to spend my lunch hour driving to the carwash.

Only the course I was in all morning went long and I had to run to my next meeting. Now the stinkmobile was parked outside the mall. I'm helping with an event there this weekend and I had to check in on a couple of details. Poo-bus sat in the underground parking, for the first time in NO danger of being stolen.

After the meeting I picked up some oranges and broccoli at the produce store inside the mall then hopped in the car and drove to the carwash. The carwash guy did not seem enthused when I told him of my plight. But he didn't send me away so in I went. It's one of those auto-washed with big fleece arms, like a giant wet soapy Muppet washing your car. When I got out I hopped out and looked. $7.24 for 85% poo removal. I saw the sign guaranteeing a perfect clean or we'll gladly re-wash, but I decided not to push my luck. I hope they flushed the place out before they let the next guy in after me. Worse, it still smelled bad.

I drove to work (I work at an ice arena) and pulled my car into the Zamboni bay. Bill, who drives the Zamboni and otherwise takes care of things physical and mechanical in the building, hauled out this big hot water hose and sprayed the tire and wheel well. The hose was a bit short, and I didn't want him to have to move the Zamboni out, so I repositioned the car a couple of times. After 10 minutes of good-natured blasting, we had 97% of the poo removed.

But it's like with shoes. You need to get rid of 101.5% or you can still smell it.

The weather report says sunny all week. Nertz.

question: did you ever have something you were trying to get rid of, but you couldn't?

mompoet - p.u.

the photo booth

Alex got his grad portraits done last night. I went with him to the high school, where the photography company had a big truck trailer parked on site - like a construction site breakroom or first aid trailer. Inside, it was outfitted for picture-taking. There's a small waiting area and change room, and two studio spaces with cameras and backdrops.

Alex and I were both a bit nervous. He does not dress formally very often, so we had purchased his first white dress shirt ever for the cap and gown photo. We had decided against a suit. He's going to rent a tux for the dinner dance, and his work and church never require a suit. There will be a time for that. He could probably use a jacket of some kind that would go with his dress pants that we bought for the Senior Sail formal earlier this fall. We'll see - there's a time for everything.

It turned out that most of the students we saw coming and going were equally nervous and variously-dressed. About half were there with a parent or adult friend. The others came on their own. I'm glad I accompanied Alex. He seemed to like having me there. I helped him make sure his shirt was tucked in right and tie straightened (he wore a different shirt and tie for the casual poses so he had to change). I stayed out of the way and out of sight while the photgraphers did their work. We don't plan to buy a whole bunch of photos. I bet they will be nice, but also expensive. We'll get cap and gown shots for us and Alex's grandparents, and see about some copies for godparents and others who will recognize his graduation.

The whole experience (including waiting for a while because we nervously arrived early) took about 1 hour. It wasn't as scary as we thought. Alex looked awesome. So did the other grads who were there. They are all simultaneously younger and older than we expect them to be. I'm glad that I was there.

question: did you ever see someone in a different light because you were in a new situation together?

mompoet - always looking

I think it's going to snow tonight

I have four snow tires on my car. I carry boots in my trunk. Today, on a day off from work, Andy and I went out for lunch near my office, then I asked him to please stop at my office for a few minutes. There were a few things that I needed to put in order in case I am delayed or prevented from getting to work in the morning by snow.

He is still laughing. He says I am paranoid.

At the office, they did not laugh at me (coming in on my day off). They just smiled and said, "It's not going to snow tomorrow."

I think they are wrong.

I am not afraid of the snow. I have 4 snow tires. I have driven in the snow lots of times, and the bus service is pretty good, and I have more than one pair of good boots. But I see no need to join in the mayhem, especially on "snow day number 1" when half of the people aren't ready, and everyone is in a panic. The roads get jammed. The buses get bogged. It's just no fun. If I could walk to work, I would, but driving down to the bottom of the last hill to be plowed in this town every year, then lining up with the slipsters and slushgrinders is a big waste of time, frustrating and sometimes dangerous.

So when it snows I stay put unless I really need to drive. Like last year, on my birthday, after an all day field trip with Grade 10 and 11 students to Bodyworlds on a school bus, just when I though I was going to have a lovely Thai supper at my mom's it snowed and snowed and snowed. I didn't drive for the supper. That could easily be postponed. I drove over the inlet to West Vancouver - the snow kingdom of the Vancouver area - to get Fi to a rehearsal. It was snowing so hard I decided to stay put. Sure enough the school where the rehearsal was held got closed an hour early and the night janitors were sent home. Driving home we saw people driving frontwards, backwards, sideways and almost upside-down. I was nervous but sure-footed with my four snowtires. It was kind of exhilarating (then exhausting) adventure at the end of a long and somewhat disappointing day. The point is, I had to drive in the snow, so I drove.

Tomorrow, I have it set up so I do not need to drive in the snow. If I am paranoid, that's okay. Maybe it will be a beautiful day. It's just feeling like snow right now, and I like to be ready.

question: how to you deal with "the snow?"

mompoet - respectfully relating to congealed precipitation

some pictures I took this afternoon

Things are turning right-side-up again

Life is still speeding by faster than I can perceive, but I seem to have found a safe and steady current and righted my boat, so the view is less overwhelming and the deliciousness is returning.

I was talking to a friend on the phone last weekend (canceling a meeting I had agreed to, and arranging to have the conversation by phone). I told her I was doing this because I was feeling overwhelmed. I needed to get smaller, quieter, closer, until I could feel more steady and confident again. She said that she understood, that it was a relief to know that others feel this way too sometimes.

I wonder why we spend our lives trying to look "just fine," even when we aren't always "just fine." I know if we all walked around moaning and groaning about every worry and irritation we'd be bogged in misery. Still, it is a good and friendly thing to admit it when we are feeling like we can't cope. Ask for help or sympathy or a reprieve from overwhelming commitments and we will be met with compassion and a feeling of fellowship.

In my neighbourhood, it is considered a compliment to invite a friend into your house when your house is a mess. By doing so, you say, "You are my friend. I trust you. You can see my mess and still be my friend just the same." It would be good if we could get better at revealing our messes of the psyche and soul sometimes. It would lower the bar for personal perfection and on-top-of-it-ness among friends. That would be good. We would all be allowed to be a little less secure, and we could take turns leading and nurturing. I would like that.

question: do you suppress your yelps of anguish? or let them out?

mompoet - practising the yelp with friends who I trust

I am going to bed now

and in the morning I will read the newspaper

READ
THE
NEWSPAPER

as in look at words and think about what they mean, for fun. yup

good night

some thing funny

We just had a pub night fundraiser for Alex's Aftergrad. We're raising funds for an alcohol and drug-free all-night party at the school after the formal dinner-dance in May.

We sold 91 tickets and raised a little over $1,000 after expenses. We'll do two more pub nights between now and Aftergrad.

I was in charge of organizing the 50-50 raffle. We did things by the books: got a license, read and followed all of the gaming regulations. Along the way I found out that there are three things that it is illegal to raffle in British Columbia:

1. alcohol
2. live animals
3. restricted firearms

Now, you may have a bottle of booze as a prize in a "twonie toss" which is a game of skill, not a raffle as governed by the gaming regulations. So Andy and I got to thinking, could you also have a toss for those other forbidden raffle items? How about a twonie toss for a handgun? or for a live goat? I guess that would be legal, which is good, because we'll have to disassemble that "gun basket" that we had almost ready for the next pub night. We could have a combo-toss for a rifle, a duck and a bottle of wine. I bet we'd clean up (only it would be hard to get the duck to stand still, so we wouldn't know which twonie was closest).

question: did you ever think the law is funnier than most greeting cards?

mompoet - I bet bureaucrats just roll around in their offices laughing their heads off.

egg in a hole for two

what I learned from a night of not talking

I dressed up as a mime the other day
an attention-getting move, considering
I was going to the poetry slam
mimes are reviled by slam poets because
they make more money than poets
and they don’t have anything to say

I concocted a costume like Marcel Marceau’s with bits from Value Village
bought a wig and a top hat
sewed on a red rose – ah, the fragility of life
applied white face paint and exaggerated lips, brows, eyeliner
and once I was done, I did not talk – not one bit
I can’t honestly say I was a mime – that takes years of having nothing to say
but I was dressed up as one

I expected to have some fun
and make a statement
and maybe get punched
well, not really, it is the poetry slam after all

What I didn’t expect was the experience
of becoming unrecognizable
at least to some of the people
invisible to others
and
well
irritating as hell to others still

Here’s what I learned from my night of dressing up as a mime at the poetry slam:

People don’t like it when you know them, but they don’t know you
but they pretend that it doesn’t bother them
I got more fake smiles and waves that night
it took me a while to figure out
people did not know it was me
but I could read their thoughts
“Who is that scary clown? What a freak!”
and feel their relief when I passed

I learned that
people admire you when you go out on a limb
the ones who knew it was me told me
that it was very cool that I really didn’t talk at all, all night
they said they liked my costume, my poster-card haiku
my effort to reconcile mimes and poets at a tribute slam
no matter who you are, it’s still what you do
that shapes the way that people think of you

I learned that
people say things to mimes that
they would not say to someone who might answer back
and that people say things near mimes that they wouldn’t risk having overheard
in regular circumstances
I learned secrets in my night of mimehood
that would not otherwise have been revealed

I learned that people do not like to struggle
to understand
maybe they’re tired of deaf people handing out those sign language cards
and asking for money
maybe they’re just creeped out by
the one-sided experience of talking with a non-verbal adult
it’s not one-sided, really
it’s just different
it could be fun
that, perhaps, was my only disappointment
nobody attempted to speak mime back to me

I learned that it is very hard
not to talk when you see people who you know
not to shout with delight
roar with outrage
heckle with impunity
clapping, beaming and handshake pumping only go so far
to express the thoughts that jump like beans behind a clenched-jaw smile

So I took photographs
finally, I felt a sense of place
in the stereotyped behaviour of the clinch and grin
my friends who did not know me
knew what was expected, and breathed out
pretty much everyone in the place posed for my camera
allowing me to capture them
in their own nonverbal moment of
CHEESE!
and even though I lack the skills to convey it eloquently, without words
I knew in that moment what it was to be a mime
loved and welcomed
at a poetry slam

And that’s all for now because
I really don’t have anything

to say

Weekly Poll about Temporary Shelters for Homeless People - Please Vote

The Tricity News' weekly poll asks readers if they support the plan for 5 area churches to take turns hosting a wet weather mat program, to provide dry sleeping places through the winter months.

Here's the question: Do you support a plan to set up temporary homeless shelters in a number of Tri-City churches?

Please vote here

Vote for HUNTER

One of Soleil's (and our) favourite dog friends has been nominated for "Cutest Dog." Please log onto the Province newspaper website and Vote for Hunter. The prize is a big gift certificate to a pet supply store. Voting carries on until noon Thursday.

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